A Wish

A Wish‎

From: Amit

Sent: Fri 2/23/07 7:13 PM

To:

A Junior Software engineer, a Senior Software engineer and their Project Manager is on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears. The Ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each". So the eager Junior Software engineer shouted, I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries. "Pfufffff" and he was gone. Now the senior Software engineer could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails. "Pfufffff" and he was also gone. The Project Manager calmly said," I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 1.30pm " Moral of the story is: Always allow the bosses to speak first" Thanks & Regards, Amit

Pic of the day....:-D ( amazing)

Pic of the day....:-D ( amazing)‎

From: Amit

Sent: Mon 2/26/07 7:01 PM

To:

	ATT362005.jpg Thanks & Regards, Amit

FW: Don't Miss

FW: Don't Miss‎

From: Amit

Sent: Tue 2/27/07 7:15 PM

To:

Golden Rules for Career Success - Richard Moran WORKING as a business consultant all over the world, I have discovered some basic career-related rules that everyone should know but many don't. ü Business is made up of ambiguous victories and nebulous defeats. Claim them all as victories. ü Keep track of what you do; someone is sure to ask. ü Be comfortable around senior managers, or learn to fake it. ü Never bring your boss a problem without some solution. ü You are getting paid to think, not to whine. ü Long hours don't mean anything; results count, not effort. ü Write down ideas; they get lost, like good pens. ü Always arrive at work 30 minutes before your boss. ü Help other people network for jobs. You never know when your turn will come. ü Don't take days off sick unless you are. ü Assume no one can / will keep a secret. ü Know when you do your best morning, night, under pressure, relaxed; schedule and prioritize your work accordingly. ü Treat everyone who works in the organization with respect and dignity, whether it be the cleaner or the managing director. Don't ever be patronizing. ü Never appear stressed in front of a client, a customer or your boss. Take a deep breath and ask yourself: In the course of human events, how important is this? ü If you get the entrepreneurial urge, visit someone who has his own business. It may cure you. ü Acknowledging someone else's contribution will repay you doubly. ü Career planning is an oxymoron. The most exciting opportunities tend to be unplanned. ü Always choose to do what you'll remember ten years from now. ü The size of your office is not as important as the size of your pay cheque. ü Understand what finished work looks like and deliver your work only when it is finished. ü The person who spends all of his or her time is not hard-working; he or she is boring. ü Know how to write business letters including thank-you notes as well as proposals. ü Never confuse a memo with reality. Most memos from the top are political fantasy. ü Eliminate guilt. Don't fiddle expenses, taxes or benefits, and don't cheat colleagues. ü Reorganizations mean that someone will lose his or her job. Get on the committee that will make the recommendations. ü Job security does not exist. ü Always have an answer to the question, What would I do if I lost my job tomorrow ü Go to the company Christmas party. Don't get drunk at the company Christmas party. ü Avoid working at weekends. Work longer during the week if you have to. ü The most successful people in business are interesting. ü Sometimes you'll be on a winning streak and everything will click; take maximum advantage. When the opposite is true, hold steady and wait it out. ü Never in your life say, Its not my job ü Be loyal to your career, your interests and yourself. ü Understand the skills and abilities that set you apart. Use them whenever you have an opportunity. ü People remember the end of the project. As they say in boxing, Always finish stronger than you start. Always put yourself in the other's shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the person too. - Unknown Regards RAHIM

FW: Interesting Comments.

FW: Interesting Comments.‎

From: Amit

Sent: Fri 3/02/07 7:07 PM

To:

Interesting Comments. Marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell? Ans : the days after marriage During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom is made to sit on the horse ? He is given his last chance to run away. I wrote ur name on the sand ........... it got washed away, I wrote ur name in air ........ ........ it got blown away, So i wrote ur name in my heart....... ....... I got a HEART ATTACK LOVE is like a CIGAR It starts with a fire..... continues with smoke..... and ends in ashes... But dont worry - we are chain smokers ur smile can be compared to a flower ur voice can be compared to a cuckoo ur inocence to a child but in stupidity u have no comparison ... u r the best True love is like a pillow u can hug when u r in trouble u can cry on when u r in pain & u can embrace when u r happy so when u need true love spend Rs.50/-Buy a pillow Dear Friend, when i ask u flower, u give me bouquet when i ask u a stone, u give me a statue when i ask u a feather, u give me peacock ARE U REALLY DEAF ? I had VODKA with WATER I felt DRUNK I had WHISKY with WATER I felt DRUNK I had RUM with WATER I felt DRUNK I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK water....!!! when i call u; 1 ring means i'm thinking of u; 2 ring means i like u; 3 means i miss u; 4 means .........pick d phone idiot Teacher : four beautiful ladies r walking on the road. change it to exclamatory sentence .. Student : WOW ! The human brain is most outstanding thing....... it functions 24hrs 365 days..... it functions right from the time u r Born.... until you fall in love SMILE - is a language of love SMILE - is a source to win hearts... SMILE - creates greatness in ur personality SO....Brush ur Teeth today onwards A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min.. A beer shortens your life by 4 min.. A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!.. History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ? Student : sir, i am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir.... Teacher : U failure ! @ ur age Bill gates stood first in the class Student : Mind u, Sir, but @ ur age hitler commited suicide

FW: Mixed funs

FW: Mixed funs‎

From: Amit

Sent: Fri 3/02/07 7:07 PM

To:

image007.jpg (40.8 KB), image008.jpg (19.7 KB), image009.jpg (39.6 KB), image010.jpg (28.9 KB), image011.jpg (25.0 KB), image012.jpg (30.9 KB), image013.jpg (50.5 KB), image014.jpg (25.0 KB), image015.jpg (41.5 KB), image016.jpg (27.4 KB)

Thanks & Regards, Amit

Laloo Got A Job in Microsoft (USA)

Laloo Got A Job in Microsoft (USA)‎

From: Amit

Sent: Fri 3/09/07 6:00 AM

To:

image001.jpg (6.0 KB), image002.jpg (6.1 KB), image003.jpg (13.0 KB)

Hi All Laloo Prasad sent his Bio Data to apply for a post in Microsoft Corporation, USA . A few days later he got this reply: Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone call shall be entertained. Thanks Bill Gates. Laloo Prasad jumped with joy on receiving this reply. He arranged a press conference : " Bhaiyon aur Behno, aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki hum ko Amereeca mein naukri mil gayee hai." Everyone was delighted. Laloo prasad continued...... " Ab hum aap sab ko apnaa appointment Letter padkar sunaongaa, par letter angreeze main hai - isliyen saath-saath Hindi main translate bhee karoonga." Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad ----- PYARE LALOO PRASAD BHAIYYA You do not meet ----- AAP TO MILTAY HEE NAHEEN HO our requirement ----- HUMKO TO ZAROORAT HAI Please do not send any furthur correspondance ----- AB LETTER VETTER BHEJNE KA KAOUNO ZAROORAT NAHEE. No phone call ----- PHOONWA KA BHEE ZAROORAT NAHEE HAI shall be entertained ----- BAHUT KHAATIR KEE JAYEGI. Thanks ----- AAPKAA BAHUT BAHUT DHANYAVAD. Bill Gates. ---- TOHAR BILVA. .

FW: Inspired by sprite :-)

FW: Inspired by sprite :-)‎

From: Amit

Sent: Thu 3/22/07 7:15 AM

To:

Imagine ur self in a Sprite Ad Your Colleague: Hey!! Kya yahan baitha mail forward karta rahta hai yaar !! Naye packages dekh.... Naye language seekh. Night out Maar....Fundoo programming kar like me....! Do something cool man !! You : Achha! To usse Kya hoga .. Your Colleague: Impression!!! Appraisal !!! Har appraisal main tu the No 1! Hike in salary !! Extra Stocks You: Phir kya hoga... Your Colleague : Project Leader ban jaayega..Phir Project Manager!!! Phir Business Manager ! One day U will be a Director of the Company man !! You : Acchha to phir kya hoga... Your Colleague: Abe phir tu aish karega! Koi kaam nahin karna padega Araam se office aayega aur MAIL check karega. You : To ab main kya kar raha hoon???? "Dikhawe pe na jao, apni akal lagao. Programming hai waste, trust only copy-paste "